You Baby Gorilla.

"See Mom, I DO use good judgement sometimes."

While I was putting the pictures up from the "Dudes With Beers, No Shirts and a Camera" founding on my photo blog, I was reminded of something I thought I'd share with my imaginary friends on this blog.

I'm a fairly intelligent guy (so modest!) but it's fair to say that I don't always use the best judgement when deciding to do or not do certain things. This is something my mom has reminded me of (read: gotten on my case about in a nice way) since I was 14 or 15 and stopped being a polite little boy all the time, and started to turn into what some people would graciously refer to as a jackass.

At one point a few years ago, Greg and I were sitting around doing nothing and debating about what we could do on a weeknight that was free and less boring than whatever else was going on. Somewhat out of nowhere, he suggests going out and digging up some graves. Not to really do anything with bones or whatever, but just to check it out I guess. Now, to be fair, I wouldn't mind having a skull or a jawbone or a whatever you call the arm bone. And I WAS really pissed at my dentist when he wouldn't get my wisdom teeth out of the biological waste bin after I got them removed so I could make a sweet necklace out of them. I really let him have it too, because I was six kinds of fucked up on all the medication. I guess I spent the whole ride back to my apartment telling my mom what a terrible driver she was, and how I'd be safer walking. Shockingly, she dropped me off with some pudding and left. There's a lot more to that story, as far as that night when I went to Americade (huge motorcycle/redneck rally in Lake George) still tore up on meds, but that's for another time.

Anyway. So while it's not like I'm completely opposed to having weird bones and shit, I've yet to get to the point where I'm ready to dig up peoples graves for them. I said "no" and that was pretty much the end of it. A few weeks later, I did something else stupid, and my mom was tellling me how I should really use better judgement, to which I replied "Well Mom, sometimes I do use good judgement. Greg wanted to go grave robbing and I said NO!"

She just kind of looked at me like I was a mirage, shook her head, and said "I'm glad you didn't do that Sawyer." Then she walked away, probably to go double check my birth certificate.

Greg was upset when he found out I told her this, but she still thinks he's a good kid, so alls well that ends well. But I still don't have my tooth necklace. So if you get your wisdom teeth out, please donate them to me. But you have to tell the dentist IN ADVANCE, otherwise he'll be a real hard-on about it.